Saturday, January 30, 2010

God's purpose in growth and learning...

My thoughts on gender variant children... As the mother of a gender variant child, I was a little disappointed in a recent television program that featured gender variant families/children. These children are not "freak shows" or objects to be "sensationalized" or "pathologized". The reality is that EVERYBODY who demonstrates any variation from the book meausure of "normal" can be clinically categorized as having a pathology. Who among us doesn't have a pathology??? Who really cares??? These are children and people... with an identitiy no different than yours and mine... THEY KNOW WHO THEY ARE and WE NEED TO LISTEN TO THEM, not dismiss them because they are children... and certainly not dismiss them because they are different. The truth is... there is nothing wrong with these people. The problem comes from a surrounding LACK OF COMFORT WITH THEIR SELF-EXPRESSION, AND THE OBVIOUS VARIATION FROM TRADITION... the socially accepted CONCEPT OF "NORMAL". We need to nurture the spirit. We need to embrace identity and allow people to express themselves for WHO they are so they can grow up to be the beautiful, gifted, amazing INDIVIDUALS that God created them to be. When will we quit cramming people into boxes and realize the beauty of diversity??? When will we abandon judgement and accept all people for the unique eccentricities of their divine nature??? This is what Christ's example has taught me... He has taught me to love and accept my child... and, more importantly, to LISTEN TO and BELIEVE her.

Sometimes the trials that people experience do not have NEARLY AS MUCH TO DO WITH THEM, THAN THOSE WHO NEED TO LEARN AND GROW FROM THEM. I think everyone who is blessed to know or come in contact with a gender variant child needs to ask themselves.... WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO LEARN FROM THIS CHILD??? Only then, will God's pupose in all of this become known. Conversion of the heart doesn't come from arguing opposing viewpoints/positions... it comes from truth... from sharing testimony... and from the power of the spirit. This is true, not only of experiences in a church pew... but in all of life's experiences. I have a testimony of WHO my child is and I thank God every day for helping me to see the truth... for allowing me to SEE HER THROUGH HIS EYES. This is my testimony and I'm thankful for it.

Friday, October 2, 2009

I am a Paren-T...

Hi, my name is Christina... and I am the mother of four children. I have a twelve year old son, eight year old son, and five year old son. In addition to my testosterone-crazed clan... I have a ten year old daughter. She was born in the same "wrapping" as the rest of my brood, but it didn't take long before she made her way into the world as someone very different.... HERself.

Cammie is a gender variant child. Born Cameron, she transitioned in May of this year at the tender age of ten. This "crusade" has challenged our family in beautiful ways. The dictionary defines a crusade as "A vigorous concerted movement for a cause or against an abuse" which seems to explicitly define our experience and the journey that we have embarked upon. I have been sharing our experience at .

This blog is going to have a little different focus. In collaboration with one of my closest and dearest friends... we have decided to share the family aspects of gender variance. This blog will be written from a family perspective and address the impact on siblings, parents, and extended family members - as we navigate through the challenges and blessings introduced through day-to-day life.

Recently, I reached a certain "summit" in my journey as a paren-T. The other morning as Cammie was getting ready for school, I was helping her pick out clothes for the day. As I laid her clothes on the bed and walked toward the door... leaving her to dress, I glanced back over my shoulder at her beautiful smiling face. For the first time since embracing her gender identity... I didn't see a transgender child. For the first time, I didn't look at Cammie with fear, anxiety, worry, distress, or concern for the future. For the first time... I looked at my child - and all I saw was my beautiful daughter. Her spirit glowed from the inside out - the way it should with all of us. I was overcome with gratitude... thankful that God has blessed me with an ability to look beyond the "wrapper" to embrace HER spiritual being.

I invite you to join our family along the way... as we learn to live authentically, love unconditionally, grow through humility, and blossom in understanding. Join us as we share the T-rials... and the gifts... of paren-T-hood.